Can't believe it's been months since I last blogged or even visited my own blog. In that time, I've been an aunt, went to Davao, back to Canyon Cove with friends, celebrated Christmas and New Year, reupholstered our chairs, attended a beautiful Tagaytay wedding and I can go on and on.
I've been keeping a small notebook to jot down random thoughts and special things happening but still....
So, this entry is my comeback after a blogging hiatus and for good reason. My heart was shattered this week.
So, here's what happened:
Today, I saw my son experience his first "real-life" heart break. Not just his usual I-want-ice-cream-but-mommy-wont-buy or i-want-to-play-the-ipad-but-mommy-says-only-on-weekends. It is real and 100x more heart-wrenching for me as his mom.
Last year before the school break, our 5 year old came home with a poem with instructions to memorize it. And so we did and a week into school this 2014, we were greeted with the happy news that our boy has been chosen to represent their school at the preschool poem recitation contest of the Las Pinas Private Schools Association.
Of course we were proud parents! Our boy didn't seem to be frazzled at all. Never shy nor lacking in confidence, he embraced this news excitedly and looked forward to reciting it in front of a crowd.
And so we practiced him, but his dad and I were careful not to put too much pressure. We wanted it to be a nice way for him to experience some friendly competition. He is just 5 years old after all and very, very playful.
Ever supportive, we met with his teacher/coach a few times to talk about costumes...
We debated on pa-cute
to a simple and ordinary kiddie outfit
On the day of the contest, the grandparents were in full support
I didn't realize competition will be that stiff-- for pre-school kids but given that kind of pressure, I would have to commend all the contestants. No one threw a tantrum, and no one forgot their lines. True, some were close to whispering but I'm pretty sure everyone did their best.
He did really well.
I went to him at the contestants' holding room while we are all waiting for the results.
I was so nervous while waiting for the announcement. We've told him many times not to expect and to just enjoy the experience.
But I know him and I know he was waiting for something tangible that he can hold. So the kids were asked to sit in front.
and more waiting....
They called the 3rd prize. And the 2nd. By this time, my boy had tears in his eyes. I asked him to come to me and just sit on my lap. I was hoping that can at least soften the blow.
When the 1st place winner was called, his tears just flowed. And my heart was broken.
Then somebody came up to him and consoled him, even carried him. Andrew E's daughter was the over all champion.
That gesture turned me from a mere fan... (taken before the awarding)
...to a super fan. He was so nice to my son and I appreciated his gesture so much.
After leaving the venue, we brought the boy to his happy place.
And in that mall, he saw this P88 pack of medals. I envy kids and how simple life is for them. He didn't get any award earlier-- so he asked daddy to buy. More than the disappointment over losing, I think my son wanted to have something to bring home. I hope the organizers will consider giving at least certificates for the kids next time.
As for my title, as my husband said, every child should experience the pain of losing. And this is our first step in learning the art of losing gracefully.